Let’s get honest about something: most of us want a picture from a photo session to look perfect. We’re paying actual money for someone’s expertise in arranging, lighting, and getting our belligerent 2 year-old to appear charming.
We want our clothes to be exactly right, the smiles to be genuine, the setting stolen from a movie set, our figures to appear 10 pounds thinner, and our kids to exude compliance and responsibility and honor-roll success.
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What we don’t want:
- fake smiles (people with kids in elementary school will understand this)
- dissheveled/thinning/badly colored or cut hair (unless you’re a hipster, in which case: bring it.)
- unsightly bulges
- to look like we’re trying too hard
- to look like we’re so casual that no one knew photos were being taken
- crying children
- crying adults (see #6)
My precious nephew having a tender moment during the family photo on Christmas Eve.
{Excuse the camera phone.}
But what if photography wasn’t about capturing perfection, but instead, documenting the very season of life in which you’re at? After all, you’ve never been here before and you’ll never be here again. No matter if you’re engaged, chasing toddlers, a sometimes cool/sometimes awkward pre-teen (was that just me?), or fluffing a recently emptied nest, your photos reflect who you are in that very moment.
From the uncontainable sparkle of a soon-to-be bride or the happy tears behind the tender smile of an adoring new mom, each moment is part of your story. And not just the moments that we see upon first glance–the outfits or the setting.
After a second, the focus narrows to the unspoken narrative a photographer expertly captures…the emotions, the heart, and the real you.
Just a guess, but it seems that magazines and those Christmas cards contribute greatly to our fascination with achieving perfection.
Sometimes, we rationalize this mindset by thinking, “I wear yoga pants and accept stray bits of food on my children’s faces as our ‘everyday’ look. Just ONCE, could we dress and act like we have it all together!”
But that is when we need to remember the beauty of imperfection. We need to put on our time-traveler goggles and visit the future.
In twenty years, you’ll sigh just thinking about the year your daughter would only wear a ratty yellow t-shirt coupled with red and white striped socks. You’ll glance at your broad-shouldered adult son and roll your eyes at his worry that his junior high acne would be immortalized. And you will look at your spouse in disbelief that you thought that age seemed “old.”
Maybe it was insane that we thought an 18-month-old would like to sit under the twinkly lights and smile nicely for the camera in the midst of devouring hoards of chocolate and opening gifts.
Perhaps this is your year to release the expectations of “perfect” and embrace the reality of the beautiful mess. To let go of ideals and sink comfortably into the life stage in which you find yourself.
Some seasons fit more comfortably than others, but they’re all yours.
